This is an easy-to-read, easy–to-understand version of the more technical terminology that lawyers are partial to. This is really important stuff, though. You’re already here so you may as well go ahead and read this page. It could prevent you from hearing from our lawyers, or worse yet, from really nasty people, like prosecutors.
This Is How Things Work Around Here:
We run this site so that people such as yourself can use it for information, education, communication, and, hopefully personal entertainment. So please feel free to browse around to your heart’s content. You can even copy stuff from the site but only for non-commercial, personal use. If you do, though, don’t fool around with the copyright and other notices all over the stuff. They’re there for a very good reason. And do not even toy with the idea of distributing, modifying, transmitting, reusing, re-posting, or anything else not cool with any of the items, including the text, images, audio, and video, for public or commercial purposes unless we give you written permission. In all honesty though it is highly unlikely we will.
If you visit our site, you’re also legally obligated to, i.e. stuck with, the terms and conditions listed below and any other law or regulation that applies to the site, the Internet, the World Wide Web, Peterborough, UK. If you have issues with this, than please does not access or browse the site as once you begin, are legally bound by the terms and conditions.
The Rules for Hanging Out on Our Site:
1. For simplicity and everyone else’s sake, please assume that everything on this site is copyrighted unless otherwise stated. You cannot use anything on this site except how we say you can use it on this page or anywhere else on the site without our written permission. As we have already stated, it’s not likely we’ll give you permission anyway. In fact, even if we wanted to, the lawyers would probably veto any deal anyway. So it’s best you don’t ask.
2. While we try to include accurate stuff on the site, we’re not promising you it’s accurate. In fact, we’re not promising you anything except fun and entertainment. So if you use anything on this site, you’re using it at your own risk. Don’t call us if there is a problem because we assume no liability or responsibility for errors or omissions on the site.
3. We and anybody else who has helped us create, produce, or deliver the site are not liable for any damages you suffer when you use it. In particular, the lawyers wish to inform you that our disclaimer includes “direct, incidental, consequential, indirect, or punitive damages arising out of your access to, or use of, the site.
Without limiting the foregoing, everything on the site is provided to you ‘AS IS’ WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EITHER EXPRESSED OR IMPLIED,
INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO, THEIMPLIED WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, OR NON-INFRINGEMENT.
Please note that some jurisdictions may not allow the exclusion of implied warranties, so some of the above exclusions may not apply to you. Check your local laws for any restrictions or limitations regarding the exclusion of implied warranties. “ Is your head spinning yet? I’m sorry about that. We put all that in quotes because we really couldn’t phrase it any other way that the lawyers would accept. But here’s what it all boils down to — we’re not responsible if you’re browsing around and the site damages you or your computer or infects it with any nasty viruses. We sincerely hope that this never happens, but if it does, don’t call us.
4. If you don’t want to make public certain thoughts or sentiments, don’t post them on the site in any bulletin board or anyplace else. The reason being anything you disclose to us is ours. Yes, you read that correctly — ours. So we can do anything we want with anything you post.
We can reproduce it, disclose it, transmit it, publish it, broadcast it, and post it someplace else. Not only that, we can even use any ideas, concepts, know-how, or techniques you post any way we want to, including, developing, manufacturing and marketing products or other things using the information you post.
5. Pictures of people or places shown on the site are either our property or someone else’s property we’re using with their permission. Regardless of its origins, it definitely is not your property. You or anyone you associate with cannot use it unless we said you could on this page or somewhere else on the site. Remember what we said before? That’s right. The answer will be no. So exercise great caution because unauthorized use may violate all sorts of laws. Be smart and keep anything you download to yourself.
6. There are also a lot of trademarks, logos, and service marks on the site that either we own or we’re using with someone else’s permission. So don’t assume you have any kind of license or right to use them, because you don’t and we’re not about to give you any. If you don’t leave them alone and mess with our trademarks, logos and service marks on our site, we will not be best pleased. Neither will the companies that own the other trademarks, logos and service marks. This means that we’re likely to sue or to ask a prosecutor to come after you for messing around with our property or the property of others.
7. You’ll probably notice we’ve linked our site to others. While that’s cool, it doesn’t mean we’ve looked at all those sites, much less checked them out periodically to see what’s going on. So don’t blame us if some site you linked to is bad or has stuff on it that offends you. Go ahead and link, but remember, you’re doing so at your own risk.
8. Let us discuss what you do on our own site. While we may occasionally listen in on chat groups, or look at the posting in our discussion groups or on our bulletin boards, we take no responsibility and assume no liability for the content of those locations or for any mistakes, defamation, libel, slander, omissions, falsehoods, obscenity, pornography, or profanity you might encounter when you visit such
places on our site. And please don’t be foolish enough to post or transmit any unlawful, threatening, libellous, defamatory, obscene, scandalous, inflammatory, pornographic, nasty, mean, or profane material or any material that law enforcement officials may consider a criminal offense, get someone in court on a civil lawsuit, or for that matter violate any law — anywhere, anytime.
While we certainly respect your privacy, we have no choice but to fully cooperate with any law enforcement authorities or court which might ask us who might have posted nasty stuff on our site.
9. Software that may be used on this Site is protected by all sorts of laws. Because of this, you can’t download or send the software to anyone in the vacation travel spots of Iraq, Iran, North Korea or any other country where the United States/United Kingdom has embargoed goods; or to anyone on the United States Treasury Department’s list of Specially Designated Nationals or the U.S. Commerce Department’s Table of Deny Orders. As if that weren’t tough enough, if you live in or are a national of any of these places, you’re not even supposed to be reading this page, so please leave quietly and turn the light off on the way out. Thank you.